Hotel sex ;-)

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enough with the touching!

So last night i went out with the love guy we went cinema and it was very nice, but he wrapped himself around myself like a girl! just um i don't even know! I guess if i were into him i'd like it? although i do struggle with PDA's but i can't even walk down the road without him touching me, either holding my hand or linking arms or just generally touching me, he gets in my way while i drive, it's just draining :-(
Am i being unreasonable? hmmm maybe :-p

Deleting the ex :-/

OK so this would be my first love :-/ Mr A i think he was last year we tried again things didn't work out we were in different places and he wanted marriage and children :-o So obviously as much as we're not really in each others lives we still chat maybe weekly and I'll always hold a special place for him :-D So this weekend he asked his Girlfriend to marry him? So i figure as just last week he told me as much as he loves her if it wasn't for the marriage and family he'd choose me :-/ I should delete him? for my sake and his? I admit I'm a bitch and he knows me better than anyone and even though we had sex when they first got together we haven't since but we've laid in bed wrapped around each other when I've felt shitty and just needed a hug and he's lovely but i really value the sanctity of marriage and think it really is for the best? So i am gonna do it! Watch for the angry response :-p It really is as much for him as me :-D He shouldn't let me use him for hugs and i shouldn't and it's never really going to be OK is it? So who knew that how the exes would disappear :-p one down um 5 to go maybe that I'm still in touch with? I should probably delete them all ha ha it's very unhealthy I'm sure :-p

Drinks with the greek?

Lol so i can't keep up with the Mr a,b,c etc. so figured I'd just stick to nick names :-D So this afternoon i went out with the love guy :-/ and every time i see him i feel more that i shouldn't be there and his texts annoy me he spells enjoy with an i :-/ not sexy :-p Spelling and grammar is important but hey the hotel is booked for the weekend so doing nothing till after that :-/ slutty i know :-p

This evening i went out with the part Greek foot fetish (perhaps) guy :-p We had a really nice time i thrashed his arse at pool :-p and then he asked what procrastinate means? Is that really an unusual word? hmmm might be a deal breaker :-p but we are going out during the week!

Completely over the French one (i think).

p.s. I am aware my grammar is just smiley faces :-p

Feeling slutty :-(

Hmmm so this week i have been a tad slutty and reached an all time low sleeping with the France man and a bit of flirting with an ex and awful horniness in general!

Well i am concentrating on the man in my life and yes technically i am going for drinks with another tomorrow evening but we'll be in public and i shouldn't actually be bad :-p

So man in my life, the one that is actually mine :-p has booked us a hotel so i figure if the sex isn't good that night it will defo be the end of us :-/ but i am holding off making a final decision till then :-p maybe a little unfair, well so everyone keeps telling me :-p but if the sex was good I'd happily stay :-/ he's pretty perfect and it wouldn't be the worse thing to settle with him.......

Anyway by feeling quite slutty it's controlled my horn which is a good thing i guess? I've not even masturbated today :-/

Back to France? ;-)

So I reached an all time low :-/

in my defence - crap sex with the french man Tues - crap sex with the love man Weds - and a day of filth with whomever would entertain me yesterday left me so horny i could barely think straight :-/

So last night about midnight i went over and fucked the french guy hmmm the sex was ok but not enough and he'd been out with someone else! I mean what sort of woman am i that i was ok to let him take someone else to dinner then fuck me anyway? WOW i feel pretty crappy about it, but have deleted him and am all in with the love guy, i know I've not been fair to him but he's crazy about me and he's mine and there is no game playing or insecurity there? he makes me feel good and i will work on the sex!

So i am over my slutty interlude although i have maybe agreed to go out with someone Sunday night ooops :-D

Car sex??

Hmmm so after finishing things with the France man Tuesday I went out with the love man Wednesday and decided i needed to know about the sex after the disaster of the alley sex and the issue of trying again. So if left to him he was all for booking a hotel and waiting but i felt i just needed to know? Sex was a breaking issue for me so i made sure i had a deviant kit in my car :-p tissues, condoms, handwash and baby wipes pmsl! and proceeded to drive him to a secluded spot and climbed on top of him and rode him :-/
This should have been good, shouldn't it? unfortunately it wasn't fully hard i don't think a bit like pushing a flump through a key hole :-( Don't get me wrong i find it pretty easy to get off and it wasn't totally awful but it also wasn't switch ya brain off fireworks type of sex :-p He did cum so i guess it's as good as it gets? i dunno we was in a car and there wasn't really space for much else :-/ maybe the hotel sex will be better - not ready to give up on him just yet :-p

But obviously my life's not that easy so there is more :-p

prostate massage anyone?

Lol so the man from France had been away all over Christmas and i had decided on him but the guy that said he loved me was so sweet that i agreed to try things with him too :-/

Saw the guy from France Tuesday and the sex was OK but not mind blowing so was pretty easy for me to tell him that i was bailing on us :-/ He'd found out this woman he liked in France liked him back and was considering trying there anyway so our post coital chit chat was all very amicable :-p

He let me lube up and probe his prostate but it just wasn't doing it for him so i think i maybe lost my magic mojo fingers :-p ha ha So we spoke about it and i think he perhaps needs to get comfortable with things himself so he can let go with me? Mr whatever letter was very comfortable with that and obviously found it really easy to be stimulated that way :-/ I enjoyed being able to make him lose control like that. :-D

Down to one!

So today i am down to one! How good am i! lol for now at least i am sticking to the guy i'm already with whom is in France! He's awesome in bed, teaching me things i didn't know and he's good to not bother me too much and he's agreed to let me strap him down and probe his prostate! PMSL let's be honest, what more could i ask for?
He does intimidate me a little, but i actually really like that about him, he's older and wiser and speaks french to me and yet is still innocent enough that i can teach him a thing or two :-p

No more i love you......

So after days of dithering and being a bitch and the man apologising for things that were not his fault and making me feel like i was kicking a fucking puppy, i broke things off with the guy who said he loved me? :-/ I don't really understand it myself :-/ he was perfect and crazy about me........Actually never thought i was too fucked up but today wondering if i'm more fucked up than i realised #50shadesoffuckedup :-( So apparently the best way to make me run is jump in with both feet! I mean fucking hell give me a shitty man who wants just sex and i'm so there but a guy who wants me and all that goes with it and it is not for me? how is that even the way to go?

So anyway he is gone the guy in France actually phoned last night and said he missed me and can't wait to see me when he gets back :-/ hoping he's just lonely and not about to get serious :-p

Oh god the friend of the ex he's got so many issues! but somehow i ended up agreeing to go out with him :-/ i'll be honest a massive part of it is that he tells me he has a massive dick and i wont walk straight for a week ;-)

I don't know i'm a little confused i thought i was ready for a relationship but perhaps i'm just ready for the idea of it.....

feck drunken sex down an alley?

Feck feck feck!

So after seeing this guy for weeks and weeks and weeks and not having sex and arranging to go away yesterday......Then throw in getting to the pub at lunchtime him telling me he loves me! (we'll come back to that) drinking copious amounts and a very drunk stroll home before drunken not enjoyable first time sex in an alley! Feck feck feck!!! As we can imagine i'm a little mortified and massively horny and not sure where to go from here?

Back to the whole L word thing, it's not appropriate lol i struggle with deep and meaningful but my friend says i'm crazy and should hang in there? :-/

Fuck i'm so good at sabotage let's also throw in that the other guy i'm seeing whom is in France text the other day to tell me he really missed me and we need to talk when he gets back!

Right so no danger with the rest of them i'm fucking all the rest off and i'm down to two but how do i choose? i was hoping the sex would decide but it was bad but we were so drunk that we shouldn't have bothered :-/  but is that a good enough excuse because i have had some awesome drunken sex? Fuck fuck fuck fuck

I feel properly slutty today and i got mud in unmentionable places oh and i fell over and broke my knee :-p

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCKITY FUCK

More men than is appropriate! :-o

Ha ha so this week i have been out with 4 different men and agreed to go out with them all again! :-D is this bad of me?
Let's start at the beginning....
Hmmm so first of all the guy i had drunk sex with a few weeks back I'm still seeing but he has gone away until the 6th of Jan so he's in a different country so it doesn't count surely? lol but i saw him Monday for the last time till he gets home :-p.....
Second is the guy i was seeing before the drunken sex things are going slowly but i have agreed to a weekend away which we are to confirm next time i see him, so no sex yet so surely that's OK and i saw him weds night always have a nice time, and he's crazy about me which is really nice, but makes me feel bad :-/.......
Third was a first date Thursday he seems lovely if a little strange asked whether i have an aversion to my feet being rubbed so wonder if he has a bit of a fetish :-p but might he like to buy me shoes ha ha...
Forth was Friday lunch and he was actually not good and I'm not seeing him again!
Fifth i was supposed to go out with another guy tonight but he called off through sickness lol bit worried about number five as he's friends well more acquaintances i think :-p with an ex :-/ usually not a problem but with the many men in my life of late maybe not great :-p

Remember Mr A or B or whatever letter you are what happens in the blog stays in the blog!!

Anyway only having sex with one? heavy petting with another and agreeing to go out with others is it OK or really bad? I really would like opinions on this one?

ooops - over a desk :-D

So i really tried to be a good girl honest i did, so in the interest of getting to know the stranger with whom i had sex i visited him at work just to chat, get to know each other decide if we wanted to go anywhere and we were doing so well until somehow i ended up with him fucking me bent over his desk :-/ I mean really!?  It was sooo good though, pretty lucky he owns the shop i feel and extra lucky no one came in but oh so hot and something else i can cross off the list :-D still seeing both :-( Naughty bad girl ;-) but the sex is great but other guy is more in line with my life :-/ hmmmm decisions decisions :-p......

assuaging guilt and squirting

WOW i haven't wrote this for such a long time! but i have been without sex for a year! So it was a bit surplus to requirements :-p
So don't judge me people but last night i had sex whilst drunk with a complete stranger :-/ feeling properly shitty about it as i am actually seeing someone too :-(
One thing at a time - i am seeing someone but it's early days we're a month in having a great time not yet having sex so it's not technically cheating is it? Don't get me wrong i'd class it as such and slit his scrotum but well that's why i'm confessing here and trying to get it straight.
Next - yes i had sex with a stranger but he was sooo nice and the sex was awesome the man knew what he was doing and he made me squirt :-o I was very pleased with this achievement as i've never really managed before but have been curious :-D and no fisting was needed :-p just the right angles and stimulation. Anyway something else i can cross off the list :-p
So the squirting was a strange sensation and happened without warnng :-) definitely something that i will revisit :-p Not as mind blowing as i expected though...

cleaning perv!

Hmmm so i really need sex i think! on top of the dry humping a teddy i have spent days deep cleaning my house so imagine my distress when cleaning the hand rail on the stairs made me horny! i mean really? surely that's not right? but as i grasped the hand rail and rubbed up and down with the cloth a bit slippery with polish i found my nipples hardening and my vajayjay getting moist and my mind running away with me! I had to go sort myself out with my magic wand! It's left me feeling far more deviant than usual :-D ooops mmmm i'm horny again thinking about it :-/

poor innocent bear!

hmmm so just a quickie to share my distress at the destruction of a teddy bear's innocence after during the week i awoke dry humping a teddy :-/ i'm not even sure how said teddy got to be in my bed and indeed there was nothing dry about it ;-) lol one can only hope that my children didn't enter my bedroom that morning as i imagine there's not enough therapy in the world to get over that tee hee hee
I have got a couple of other blogs that i need to finish off but i'm mid spring clean so haven't had much time but i will endeavour to get them finished :-) you guys rock drop me a line with some ideas of what to blog about i'm running out of deviancy :-p

sex dolls!

So i was just reading a magazine article about sex dolls, pretty realistic sex dolls too! the whole nine yards rubber bodies, hair, teeth, make up the lot made to measure and pretty awesome! not sure where you'd keep one :-p anyway as much as i'm slightly disturbed there's a thriving business for these i'm all for things that give us pleasure.........what disturbed me was a small list of repairs, amongst them a colon replacement and labia lips replacement! i mean fuck that man must have been going at it some to do that sort of damage!? ha ha hats off to him :-)

hmmmm i wonder if i might like to give one a go :-) not sure where i could hide him though he he

lesbians?

So today i was asked why lesbians use dildo's and strap on's if they don't like men? and I've gotta say i'm not sure? I guess i use them whilst masturbating but i like cock and actually think it's no substitute? give me a real willy any day :-)
I also questioned this when the lovely Mr B let me fuck him with a strap on? i mean, i guess I'd take cock over strap on any day so had to wonder why he wouldn't ?........but saying that he said it was more about me doing it and not something he imagined a guy doing? So i guess it's more about getting the most pleasure from the person you're with?
hmmmmm i wonder..........well i couldn't live without cock and think lesbians are missing out :-)

Rehab?

So today i've got to wondering what rehab for sex addiction would consist of? I mean they surely can't stop masturbation? So what do they do i wonder?

I come to this train of thought after watching a program about an armless man who made me think if i ever lost my arms i'd need rehab for my masturbation habit! Or indeed i wonder if medical prescriptions could include a personal masturbator? that would be awesome! I'd do that job ;-).......but while i understand that with no arms you'd have to go without :-/ I don't understand firstly why anyone would want to be cured of sex addiction and secondly how they cure you of it :-o

thoughts?

sex on the bonnet?? just a quickie ;-)

WOW so 6 weeks without sex and i'm practically constantly copping off with myself you porn has been on my laptop often! On that note can i say, that i have managed to misplace the DVD Mr B made me of him copping off :-/ having a couple of teenagers in my house this is a worry! I'm sure it's here somewhere though :-o

so anyway back to the deviancy, the mention of sex on a bonnet has made me think I'd quite like this perhaps tied to the wing mirrors? face down? flat on the bonnet not too hot :-/ mmmmm I've given myself the horn! mmm naked hard metal pressed against my nipple spread over a bonnet! OK this needs to go on my sex bucket list!

Mr A = Tosser

Not the usual deviancy just ranting :-)

Hmmm ever felt like you can't get it right? Well today Mr A reached new lows firstly let's be clear that we're totally not together more his fault but willing to admit relief was the overall feeling :-/
hmm so he's been in my life for so many years that it seems an awful shame to not have him there but he's making it hard!
Firstly he's seeing someone else, which i'm fine with but have no real interest in, but I've sat and listened to her good points and how she's perfect for him, fuck I've listened about their sex life hoping we'd be OK but when his facebook became filled with photo's and declarations of love and relationships :-p i decided to hide his posts not wanting to be a cow and delete him so just hid them because i'm not made to stalk and don't really give a flying rats arse but anyway apparently i'm still a cow for doing this because i missed something he wrote on there? :-/ clearly i'm not getting it right! add to that that i'm awesome girlfriend material and your mum will love me :-p well his mum phoned me and invited me and the kids for new year :-/ something which I'd sort of planned with her when with Mr A but obviously something i don't want to do now, i tried to explain it to her but she was having none of it so i phoned Mr A (got in trouble for phoning whilst the new girl was there) and asked him to have a word with his mum for me and not to be horrible but to get me out of it? not unreasonable? anyway this ended up with me muscling in on his family and spoiling his chances of taking the new girlfriend? Fucking arse holes! i can't be arsed with it i hope he gets itchy balls and is unable to scratch them! grrrrr toss pot :-o

looking back :-)

So it's that time of year when we look back over what's been going on in the year, well i was looking back over my blog at previous posts and actually i was thinking I've not had a bad year :-D hmmm also looking at last years resolutions and can happily say i succeeded in all of them! some of them took longer than new year's day but i got there and managed all of them!
So this got me thinking about this years resolutions :-/ hmmmm what do i want from next year??
Suggestions guys?
can i put find a deviant lover as a resolution?

professional masturbating???

Hmmm so being out of work is leading to copious amounts of masturbation i'm not sure how I'll cope with being back in work? unless i can find something that lets me masturbate on the job :-p It really is a shame i couldn't be a prostitute because it's almost a perfect job for me well other than the sleeping with fat old men :-/ Hmmmmm maybe i could vet potential employers :-p ha ha ha i like sex far too much to charge for it :-D

break up lessons :-)

Found this on line and thought it was very true so thought I'd share :-)


9 Best Lessons from Breakups...
1. Being Single is Okay
Some women may have been in a relationship for so long that they're not sure how they feel being single. It's a big adjustment to go from being one-half of a couple for so long to now being on your own. While going through a breakup, you can learn a surprising amount of information about yourself. Being single is also much better than being in an unhappy and unhealthy relationship.

2. You Can Have a Life That Doesn't Include Him
At one point, you likely envisioned a future with your boyfriend and couldn't imagine what your life would be like without him. After a breakup, you may find yourself saying "I don't know how to have a life without him in it." You can do it, but it takes time to adjust. Don't let him tell you that it's impossible; you can have an even better life than you did before even if he's not a part of it.

3. There is No Excuse for Certain Actions
In a relationship, you can sometimes be blinded by love. There are probably times when you forgave certain actions you probably shouldn't have, but after a breakup, you realize what those things were and how you should have reacted differently. If you learn from those mistakes, there's a good chance you won't let them happen again.

4. Love is Not Enough
When we're young, many of us follow our heart first and think second about if it's the right decision. As we get older, that starts to change but somewhere deep down we still carry that hope that maybe love really is enough. Unfortunately it's not - there's lines he may cross that even love can't fix - but learning that can actually help you. Love can do a lot - it can get us through some really tough times, but when you learn it's not all you need in a relationship, you learn not to completely rely on that. You start working harder on everything else it takes to make a relationship work and expect your boyfriend to do the same.

5. Communication and Trust Are Essential
A lack of trust or communication has led to many relationships falling apart. Many know this going into a relationship, but knowing and following through are two different things. After a breakup, think about when you could have communicated better and when you should have trusted your now-ex and didn't. You may not want to think about it and rehash old memories, but it can help you in future relationships.

6. Assuming Gets You Nowhere
There have probably been several times when you made an assumption about a situation, got angry and later found out the anger wasn't warranted. A few months ago, I was angry when I thought I got stood up by a guy I was dating. After awhile, I got a text saying he was on his way. It turns out there was an outage in the subway, his train was stuck and since he was underground he didn't have cell service - the outage was all over the news the next day. If you get angry at a future boyfriend about something, give him a chance to explain himself before you hit the "ignore" button when he calls.

7. He'll Cheat if He Wants to
If your now-ex told you it was your fault he cheated, he's wrong - he's the one that had the final decision to leave you or cheat and he chose the latter. I know it's a scary thought - that a man will say say you're amazing and he'll mean it, yet he could still cheat. On the other hand,, some women almost suffocate their men in an effort to keep them from cheating, but it really doesn't work and may actually have the opposite effect. They'll try to keep men from doing certain things like going to a sports bar to watch a game or speaking to a female friend once every few months. It's not a good feeling to be cheated on and unfortunately, most of us have been through it at least once, but regardless of how you treat him, if he wants to cheat badly enough, he's going to do it.

8. You Can't Change Him
When I was younger, I was involved with someone who was addicted to certain substances. I worried all the time, had trouble sleeping and talked to him all hours if he needed support. It finally got to a point where I knew I couldn't help him when he wasn't willing to help himself. After a breakup, you may feel completely guilty and heartbroken walking away from him, but the truth is, you can't make him change if he doesn't want to or isn't ready to. It doesn't just apply to someone who has an addiction, it applies to anything you may want to change about him whether it's that he doesn't feel like getting a job or he parties too much. There's only so much you can do for someone - the rest is up to him.

9. Reveal Sooner Than Later
While everyone is entitled to their secrets, there's just some that can wreck a relationship. If there is information you know deep down your partner should know, keeping it from him can only cause problems. The longer you delay telling him, the bigger the problem gets - then, in addition to revealing the secret, you also have to worry about explaining why you didn't tell him earlier. You never want to get to a point in or after your relationship when you say "I should have told him sooner."

As much as we say we would never do specific things or react in a certain way while in a relationship, sometimes you truly don't know until you're actually involved in the situation with someone you're head-over-heels in love with. After a breakup, once you truly grasp the lessons and learn from them, you're likely to do everything possible not to make the same choices the next time. If you have to go through the heartbreak of a breakup, it's better to at least make sure you're getting something in return for all your hard work.

I found the list here:
http://yourwisdom.yahoo.com/your-relationships/lessons-learn-breakup-art...

so fucking horny!

Hmmmm so today i went to see Mr B's new house and was already horny after talking to my bestie this morning so had copious amounts of masturbation before i went to ensure good behaviour! I was nearly tipped over the edge by his fiddling with himself and obvious hard on! glad he didn't try anything not sure how much my resolve would have held out :-o grrrr rushed out at almost indecent speed, i think :-/ oh well :-p needed to get home to sort myself :-) Think i might be just about masturbated out though! if there is such a thing.

A bit of filth! :-)

So we all know that i'm bloody horny, all the time! So recently a certain young lady and a hot guy have been entertaining my filthy mind was some real filthy talk. :-) It's been pretty awesome and OK they both live the other side of the world and i'm never gonna meet them but they can both do a very good job of getting me off, and they are seeing me through this dry spell ha ha so the lady in question is fecking hot and definitely making me reconsider the whole lesbian thing :-p and the man well i do like a man that can talk dirty comfortably :-) You know how some people do it but obviously aren't comfortable with it well the people in question are very good at it and make me properly horny :-)

pyjama's??

Hmm so i read today that pyjama's spell the end of the honeymoon stage? I've never been one for clothes in bed or anywhere else for that matter but i guess if there comes a stage that you wear pyjama's instead of diving under the covers naked to feel your partners nakedness this would indeed spell an end to the exciting sex times :-/ with Mr A it actually used to bother me that he wore boxers all the time, unless fucking me?? he'd get up and put them on after? seemed a bit weird other guys have done that i guess though but never pyjamas! lol i am now going to take this as a massive insult if a man wears pyjamas in bed with me :-o

Sorry about the depression the other day and thanks to the lovely Mr B for checking in on me :-p
Have got more to say on the whole Mr A  saga but not today or not just now.
Anyway opinions about the pj's?

single again :-/

Hmmm so i'm single again me and Mr A were destined to fail i feel :-/
We had far too much history and know each other far too well and he's a jealous fuck and i can't cope with the insecurity and i felt like i was always walking on egg shells, i mean i stopped talking to all the other exes :-p except when he pissed me off :-p wrong i know but hey who can help it. So it's been a couple of weeks and i'm struggling to be civil mainly because he's started seeing someone else! Now i know i don't want him but i guess i wanted to mean more than him moving on a couple of weeks later and i know that he's insecure and needy and can't cope with being alone but still! it gets to me :-( So now i'm usually all for being friends with ex's but i'm wondering whether this is actually hurting me more than it's helping and for the first time i'm considering wiping them all out of my life? I mean seriously we're not friends? I'd never phone them (unless i'm horny) and i'm sure none of them really view me as a friend i'm a boredom filler more than anything :-/ Wow i'm a little ray of sunshine today :-(

drunken communications ;-)

So tonight the lovely Mr A has gone out and that's fine obviously but it got me to wondering about drunk texts/calls/emails/facebooking :-p and what strikes me is that you should get them and if you don't surely there's something wrong? I mean when i'm sober i happily bother him especially if i'm horny so clearly drunk it's not even something i can control? So last time he went out, he didn't and i was a bit put out because he was really drunk and i wasn't the person he wanted to contact? chances are if he had of got in touch i would have told him to fuck off but still! It's surely a massive compliment and a real shame if someone gets drunk and resists the urge? i dunno perhaps it's unreasonable? thoughts people? oh and i feel i should make it clear he wanted to contact me but was pretty sure I'd be pissed about it he he he :-)

mmmmm bum sex :-)

Hmmmm so i haven't had bum sex for a while and I'd almost forgotten how much i like it :-) OK so it's a bit weird going in but once it's in, it's bloody good :-) It does feel really good and i think i should have it more :-)

Also a bit of an update things are going good with Mr A I'm getting used to the sex and starting to enjoy that he doesn't cum loads but instead lasts ages, at first i found it really hard and felt almost like it was a personal slur :-o lol (quality over quantity i'm told :-p) but i get what i want from the sex and he likes me cumming loads before he does and so sometimes sex goes on a bit longer than I'd like but hell i guess that's nothing to moan about and well he usually managed quite often and after the first time he's not so good at holding back and i'm getting better at making him cum against his will :-) I still haven't made him cum from blow jobs yet although i think he's holding back on purpose just to keep me giving him loads of blow jobs he he he not that i mind and i don't really mind him not cumming i just need lots of reassurance that it's not me :-) so yeah all in all things are not bad he's a bit emotional and girly and gets all stroppy that i'm not shouting our relationship from the rooftops but he puts up with it and well facebook isn't for my private life :-p ha ha and i'm just not ready yet either :-/

i'm awesome :-p

So tonight as i sit here drinking my bulmers and eating nik naks i'm struck by my awesome girlfriendness :-p
So tonight i was awesome i went i took food cooked dinner while he got in the bath, cleaned his kitchen, gave him copious amounts of sex and stopped when he moaned of overuse :-p before massaging thoroughly until he was almost comatose then left him to enjoy his relaxing state :-p
I was in a good mood though i had an awesome wank earlier :-) it left me with a huge grin on my face and in such a good mood absolutely gorgeous! ha ha even felt the need to treat my magic wand like a light sabre :-o ha ha such a geek i know

every time! tea and blow jobs?

So i was seriously starting to wonder if me and Mr A could make things work? but tonight we argued over fucking tea?! i mean really?

So how did we start, oooh let's go back a day or two when Mr A reminded me I'd never finished him off with a blow job mostly because he always stops me and because he didn't manage it often enough for me to waste it :-p but well anyway i'm feeling inadequate! so moving on tonight i went over he started on me before i finished my tea but well he made me cum quite a lot so i forgave him then he stopped before he cum he stopped not me although I'd had my share :-p so i wanted a drink and asked him to get it? wow he refused let's not forget that after orgasm the legs are shaky and i really would have appreciated it but well i got up and got my own fecking drink! but i was put out but well 10 mins later i was horny i thought I'd give him a blow job and let him finish off after all I'd had my lot :-p but well i couldn't make him cum well i couldn't he couldn't who knows anyway we fucked he cum then i suggested he should make tea where he suggested i hadn't made him cum and he'd had to do it "himself" :-p clearly already feeling a little insecure i didn't need that then he kicked off about it being my turn to make tea and i left i couldn't even be arsed to argue over such crap! obviously i came home and we ended up arguing on msn anyway:-/
I don't know what to do about him now :-/ that's ridiculous though isn't it?

Hmmm not so good!

So i was so proud of not having sex with Mr A then the next morning he knocked kissed me bent me over the stairs and thoroughly fucked me :-) Now that's most definitely what i like :-)

Feel a bit shitty that other man's nan died :-/ can't work now knowing on the day his nan died i was fucking someone else on my stairs :-/

What to do about Mr a???????............ i don't know

three times?

Hmmm so the new man in my life has cancelled on me three times in the past week! All legitimate reasons but it makes me think it shouldn't be this hard? So first time he was ill throwing up second time he got caught up at work and now today his Nan had a heart attack! Don't get me wrong i know that can't be helped but seriously should i not take this as a sign from the universe? Well after cancelling before only death was going to be acceptable but surely you wouldn't just say that to get out of something? I can't help but be quite cynical about this, obviously it hasn't helped that i let Mr A take me to dinner to console me :-p he just put doubts in my mind on the bright side i didn't have sex with him although i will admit at one stage this evening he had his fingers up my vajayjay in the pub :-/ not appropriate behaviour :-p

phone sex :-)

Hmmm so a spot of phone sex with the new man today and what can i say? The man shows promise :-o So we're still not actually having sex but i don't know honestly how long I'll hold out! Dam society and it's slutty rules!

Oooh and the other day i had a spot of filth online with um Mr B? i think he is :-p and he's the best at filth he made me cum just through a bit of dirty talk oh and my own mind :-p I've never done that before! I've always cum easy but that's surely not right? especially as i feel nothing for him these days? I guess that makes me extra slutty? hmmm oh well :-p

Attracting pervs?

Hmmm so i'm in the early days of meeting a new man and things are progressing slowly and i'm so fucking horny it hurts but this is beside the point the point is that phone calls with said new man have become a little heated, as ya do :-p and he proceeded to send pictures of an intimate nature to me? I'm all for this and obviously used said images as masturbation aides but it concerns me that he would so early on it's only been a week and we're not doing anything physically yet and obviously he's not the first man to do this so it makes me wonder if that's the kind of guy i attract? Pretty big bonus i guess as i do love a perv :-D Dam we need to make it to date 5 very quickly :-)

just a quickie :-)

lol not as deviant as it sounds this is just an update for my sex bucket list :-p thought i better put it on while i think of it :-)

Sex in a seedy American motel which has a vibrating bed powered by dime's :-o ha ha

Such a piss head!

So i think i might be becoming an alchie :-p good times ha ha

What do i need to say Mr A is a fucker and i love him but as a friend we have a fragile friendship at present which i feel i'm the only one trying to save as he wants me and babies :-/ such a worry! Mr B also a fucker he has decided to move into a house on my running route clearly making it that i can't go that way because red sweaty and gasping is never a good look! Mr C i feel bad that i should have seen but haven't quite got round to but i will! but he's a fucker too! Mr D is totally outta my life and now Mr E new man shows promise, he's a police man :-) but he wants babies not necessarily a problem as i'm broody as fuck? and he's so fucking hot :-D

ooops just checked Mr C should be Mr D and vica versa :-p

wine again :-)

I've had too much to drink so sorry if this is a bit gibberish but few things i feel the need to make note of first Mr A? grr can't remember who's who anyway he's a tosser who fucking thrives on making everything about him much too draining to date so back to friends :-/ also after a bit of experimenting with neck to wrist behind the back restraints i find myself a bit more understanding of the whole strangling heightening the orgasm? still not sure I'd comfortable encourage someone else to d it but i did find myself tugging a little harder that appropriate on said restraints :-D 

Sorry for the massive gap in blog posts but I've not been home much :-)

grrrrrr fecking idiot men!

Hmmmm so today i had a massive row with Mr A really reminds me why i don't want to be with him! Granted he broke up with his g/f last week but my god the man is one miserable fucker! Honestly everything is about him and it's so fecking depressing but I've tried to be a good friend and be supportive and listen and even apologised for occasionally telling him he's a miserable fucker! Well anyway he's depressed and lonely and on the verge of getting involved with some awful woman but even this i tried to stay out of understanding he perhaps needs someone to get over his ex? but said woman has let him down loads and seems to be generally fucking him about so can you imagine how enraged i was when he said this phrase! "I'll be home at 5 I'll meet you there not sure how long I'll be about though because that girl said we might meet" Hmmm well i can deal with a lot and indeed when he had the g/f i dealt with being fitted in but fuck off am i ever playing second to some jumped up little bitch that's fucking him about anyway. Needless to say i let rip and told him to fuck himself and explained that you know i'm not being fitted in he either arranges to see me or not, unreasonable?
Well then we stopped talking till he text me about 9 saying "told you, you should have come over she cancelled on me" Fuck the man obviously has a death wish after some heated words he text " so i take it you're not coming over?" grrrrrr obviously this started me off again and then i got oh i can't do no right all you women just try making me feel shit none of the m care it's just all about how shit i make them feel i just wanted some affection and to feel worth something, obviously it made me feel bad and gave me the hump :-p but i apologised if i made him feel shit but explained that it works both ways and obviously if i didn't give a shit firstly it wouldn't bother me and secondly I'd just ignore it all :-/ any way worse still after that he text "so shall i come over?" ummmm no! fucking leave me the fuck alone for a few days! i get over things quickly but just wasn't happening tonight! He must have upset me even the thought of sex couldn't tempt me!

Mr A is single :-/

Hmmm so Mr  A is newly single and i'm not sure how i feel about it? I like that i don't have to feel guilt about fucking him but because i can fuck him at my leisure it's not so much fun :-o wow that makes me a real bitch! hmmmm he's got a tendency to be somewhat clingy too and i find myself  holding back to prevent this it makes me a little mean at times to make sure he realises that he's not what i want long term :-/ i don't mean to be though.

Oooooh more importantly i popped his anal cherry! He wasn't so keen :-/ ha ha he claims it was too much too soon and he just felt violated ha ha I've left him alone since but do not know if to try again or whether it was a definite keep the fuck away? He's not been near my ass since, i wonder if he fears if he does it i will?

doubts?

Hmmm why am i up so early, when i was oh so drunk last night. I don't remember getting home and i'm a little worried about what i might have done on line :-s Not what i wanted to talk about though.

Hmmm so yesterday i got talking to Mr A and he said these words "sometimes it's easier to get hard to porn by myself"??
Is this true? and should i be offended? am i just being over sensitive? I hate that i'm not better than porn! Hell it's made me feel positively inadequate!
So this came from last time we had sex, he struggled to get properly hard, blaming it on too much wanking. Obviously this is difficult in the first place (boys if you can't get hard we will think it's because you don't fancy us :-p) but i just worked harder ;-) and he says he didn't expect to cum but did anyway and i really am all his slutty dreams in the bedroom but i hate that he feels he could easier get hard by himself with porn:-/
I guess i can get off quicker with my vibrator and a bit of porn but not easier, well maybe easier :-p hmmmm OK i get it but still i hate that he said it, it's made me feel inadequate and surely men should find it easier to fuck me than wank humpffff!

vicks? It burns!

Hmmm note to self; do not leave Vicks on bedside table as man in your life despite the lights being on! will assume it's something deviant and liberally spread it on your vajayjay! Be warned, it burns!
To be fair it's quite a nice burning and I'd be up for doing it again with a little less perhaps? lol needless to say last night there was too much of it and it took plenty of diluting with some banana lube to get over it ha ha i think he suffered more than me :-p

grrrr and breathe

hmmmm so i need to vent!
Tonight i did it i slept with the ex again after 17 days might i add I'd been doing so well and to make it worse it was mediocre sex :-/ um once no real foreplay no cunnilingus nothing! i'm raging grrrr sure way to piss me off is leave me horny! So you know the sex was OK as foreplay little desperate and frenzied and adequate but not as a 17 days without sex! I don't give a shit how knackered he is, or how much he needs sleep or even that he was not really in any state to fuck me again he's usually pretty good at making up for the fact that he takes his time to recover but tonight i'm left disappointed. hmm i can get over how bad i feel for good sex but not ever for mediocre sex! Can't believe he actually left claiming exhaustion grrrrr and breathe time to go sort myself out :-p

ice cube sex :-)

oooh so i forgot to mention this but feel it warrants one :-)

So like i say Mr A has a tongue piercing so he got the ice out and it was good but perhaps better than this was he got the ice out during and whilst i wouldn't recommend this unless unbearably hot! On Monday it was so as i rode him and we got hot and sweaty it was pretty nice when he run ice down my back and pretty awesome when he rubbed it across my clit and so i was all for him popping a piece up my vajayjay :-) which he did and once it was it i couldn't really feel it but he certainly enjoyed it which was pretty awesome and yes it was very wet but like i say on a hot muggy night it was definitely the way to go :-D

anal cherry popping :-p

lol so I'm back from an illicit encounter with Mr A :-p where the sex was pretty good i let him have his first sober anal encounter which was awesome! I do love a bit of anal! I'm still to pop his anal cherry but give me time :-p He's agreed to let me at least i just need to grab some anal lube as all i have is flavoured stuff and that can be a bit sticky much better for licking off :-)

So the sex is pretty good getting better, the man's willing to learn at least but one or two things bother me :-/ first he doesn't manage often i guess he goes for quality rather than quantity :-p but I'm finding this a little hard to deal with. Don't get me wrong we all like a man that lasts but not always? I want to be able to make him cum and he doesn't he purposely holds back which obviously as he doesn't go again without moaning is maybe a good thing but it makes me feel like i'm crap at it? lol some of it is he stops me rather than i can't do it but still!

On the plus side his oral is coming along swimmingly! He is pretty awesome and getting better, he has a tongue piercing which is a first for me but definitely something I'd encourage! He really enjoys oral to properly gets in there which is so good! even after he's fucked me which a few men are a bit iffy about but he has no qualms about that i don't think I'd ever get bored which is good because he likes giving and i love receiving :-p what i would say though is after he's made me cum hard he carries on touching me when i just want to lay and twitch and enjoy the sensation ha ha never happy.

mistress material?

Hmmm so after entering into this illicit affair with an ex not the one with the toddler girlfriend even i can't be that much of a bitch that I'd be party to turning a child bitter, cynical and twisted :-p The one from many years ago wow my love life is complicated perhaps i should code them all?

So Let's start at the beginning let's have Mr A, he is currently in my sex life and i used to date him, well lived and was engaged to him when i was 16. Anyway we are now having pretty good sex but he has a girlfriend :-/

Mr B, He will be the guy that i was with when i started the blog :-) forever immortalised because he let me fuck him with a strap on :-D

Mr C is the one who raped my blog not a massive part of my life so figure we wont hear about him much.

um Mr D he is the guy who was 20 years older than me, he gets a brief mention every now and again :-)

hmmm think that's it for now i'll add to this as time goes on maybe :-p oooh that reminds me must look at the sex bucket list :-)

Anyway back to being mistress material, I'm not sure i am? So I'm fine that he has a g/f but i struggle with him talking about her? i mean really I'm either the girl you fuck or the girl you moan about your g/f to? because really OK she doesn't give you affection the sex isn't great but you're fucking someone else? clearly you're the one in the wrong :-p and also sporadic sex gives me the hump! and he's still being a bit of a wimp about sex, he moans a lot! Fuck i need a replacement :-p I am dating lots still though :-p

not working!

Hmmm so i know I'm all fucked up about the ex but well sex is better than none so i thought i might stick it out but for fuck sake the man moans! I mean really is there any such thing as too much sex?
I don't think so but fear after the man says I've turned into "some kind of sadistic nymphomaniac" :-o that he thinks maybe you can have too much sex and god it's taken him 2 days to recover from a couple of hours! Fucking hell boys thought it was every man's dream to have a nympho lover? :-/ and well just last week he was moaning of a distinct lack of sex? what's the deal? I'm fucking horny obviously and this is making me very cross :-p and i actually think I've always been this way just maybe he's getting too old for it :-p after all you boys peak at 18 and he is 33 :-p ha ha ha fecking wimp

and again!

OK so I'm not sure what I'm doing! GRRRRRR fecking men! Just come back from the ex's, he cooked me dinner and we were supposed to chat about what we were going to do now? Hmmm so he informs me he's on a "break" from the girlfriend and this i believe is my cue to bow out? I figure if we carry on this break will be permanent and to be honest he's a means to an end at the moment and not actually anything more? Sex is OK nothing wildly exciting but not bad? except i left him moaning that 3 times was enough and he thought I'd broken him! Fecking wimp! :-p So now we're just down to what we can salvage from this mess! He's my longest standing ex and he's always been about although we always float in and out of each others lives depending on if we're single or what but i fear we can no longer be this? More to the point i wonder whether all my ex's should not be in my life? Perhaps it's time to have a clear out?

Anyway today i ask can men and women be just friends after sex? i always thought yes and this 16 years of friendship was a great example and now I'm left wondering if I'm just kidding myself?

ooops i did it again :-/

Hmmmm so last night i had the ex over was supposed to be about us getting over last weekend and just having a laugh but well a bottle of vodka later and we ended up back in bed! Damn it! I've got no self control when it comes to sex :-/ grrrrr so now i don't know what to do? Don't want to lose him as a friend but it's pretty clear we can't be just friends at the moment and as much as i love having him in my life i don't actually want him :-/ although the whole no strings sex thing works for me and the fact he has a girlfriend while making me feel a massive bitch also means i get just the sex without the emotional crap? Wow i am actually a massive bitch! oh well :-)